Forbidden
by XxblackwingsxX
Summary: ... Out of all the people in the world, I chose to love my own cousin. FORBIDDEN LOVE. ONESHOT. MxN. RxR please?


Title: Forbidden

Author: XxblackwingsxX

Rated: T

Genre: Romance/Hurt

Disclaimer: I do not own Gakuen Alice. Yeah… =)

Note: I got inspired in writing this after a very 'hilarious yet meaningful' event that happened to me. Haha! Gosh… But the mood turned out to be 'gloomy' or other words synonymous to that. Anyway, hope you'll like it!

…

"Natsume nii-chan… Can you teach me how to play the guitar?"

I was just ten years old when me and that certain raven with mysterious crimson eyes met. I was still naïve and innocent back then. My hair still tied in pigtails and loved playing with worms and marbles. Right… it was gross. But those games brought us together, me and my Natsume.

"Whatever."

I laughed lightly as I recalled the times that I've spent with him. Everyday was full of fun and never-ending chattering though he's older than me for two years. Well, I was a talker while he would just reply with his 'Hn's' and 'Whatever's' but his hoarse or frequently, bored tone was etched in my mind. His messy hair looked so smooth in my hazel orbs and his crimson eyes, always ardent and that appalled me at first, was unforgettable. Those unnecessary observations were unexplainable in my case.

I guess he was sort of a close-book and can't-let-you-see-through-me kind of person before. That's why I was intrigued, greatly. But he never failed to bring smiles on my face nevertheless. That's why I like him… typical of me, liking all of my friends. '

Or was it just like?' I blocked and buried it at the back of my mind. It was wrong.

Five years after, we still hang out during weekends or if there were no classes and didn't mind what others think. Often times we were mistaken as lovers and we just laughed our ass out or went with the flow.

"Here honey, a ticket to the love booth." He sarcastically said and shove a white paper on my face.

"Thank you hon, you're so sweet!" I answered back, raising a pitch on my voice and clung to his arm. I burst into laughter afterwards.

"You sounded like a mooing cat." He smirked after licking his ice cream. He's a sucker for one.

"Mooing cat?! Oh my dear, you have gone nuts. Just when did a cat moo-ed?" I patted his back then let out a fake disappointed sound.

"When you're born."

"Are you trying to make me laugh or you're just a plain jerk?"

"Hn."

We were teenagers; young, carefree and adventurous. And speaking of which, our day would never end without unexpected happenings occurring. But a certain event made me realize what I really felt about him. A feeling that I've been keeping deep inside me, locking it in the depths of my head because I knew, it was a mistake and that made my heart ache… even up to now. I never knew that too much closeness can lead to something more like confusion and even, pain.

…

"Natsume where are we?" My pitiful voice echoed inside the unknown forest. We were full of enthusiasm and wild ideas, I remembered, and that troubled us.

"… I don't know." He replied. For five long years, that was the first time I heard his voice quiver. He tried to give me a reassuring smile but failed to do so. Though I was afraid, I mustered all my courage left and clutched his hand.

Hugging him from behind, I softly said. "Don't worry Natsume nii-chan… we'll get out from this place. Kami-sama won't forsake us, believe it, okay? Besides, we enjoyed exploring here so that's alright."

He nodded and his expression wasn't seen since he was facing his back on me but I smiled for I knew that somehow, I lessen his burden. When I was about to freed his hand, he turned to me, our fingers still entwined. He pulled me to his chest and my heart raced as if my life was on stake. His arms securely wrapped around my waist as if he would never let me go. Then I felt his warm breath on my earlobe as he spoke.

"Thank you… Mikan."

He rarely said my name because usually, he called me nicknames and that was one of those rare occasions. I didn't shrugged nor pushed the thoughts and the emotions firing up inside me that time, instead, I embraced them. But that moment was excruciating, it was absurd and forbidden yet I tried.

"I…" My lips trembled and tears trickled down my flushed cheeks. I still didn't have enough guts to tell him what I felt for him. I was a coward.

'What would happen then? Will he push me away? Or does he feel the same?'

I tilted my head up and saw him smiling and his eyes were soft. How unusual of him. My head then started spinning and I grabbed his shoulder for support. My vision was blurry, crying out his name I heard his panicked voice. I didn't know what was happening… then I felt nothing, I was numb.

The next thing I knew was I woke up in a room, a familiar one which I later on found out that it belonged to my auntie, a cold towel placed on my head and my clothes were changed. I realized then that Natsume was not around. I fretted and scrambled out of the bed even though I felt so weary and my body wasn't in a good shape. I was feeling delirious as I hurried down the stairs but determination outran it.

'I needed to see him. I wanted to-' I was about to cry but halted when the boy I was eager to see stared at me at the bottom of the staircase.

"Idiot. You have a fever go get a rest." he frowned.

"Natsume…" My heart thumped really hard as if it would get out of my chest, it hurt. I ran towards him and hugged him firmly. "I'm sorry Natsume… I know I made you worried."

"As if…" he chuckled but didn't squirm on my embrace and to my surprise he equally returned the hug, "…you almost gave me a heart attack. I'm just glad that we got out of the forest unscratched. Too bad mama, papa and auntie Yuka aren't here to take care of you."

He was being out of character and that puzzled me. Usually, he would tease me for being a crybaby but at that time, I felt the warmth he was giving off. I didn't know but it seemed like a cue for me so I confessed.

"Natsume… I really love you." I blurted and blushed in embarrassment. "I love you more than a-"

"I love you too Mikan…" he cut me off and paused. He cupped my cheeks. "… more than anyone. But we both know that feeling like this is not permitted, right? not only in the society but also by our families. I don't want you to get hurt… We're blood-related and something like this is forbidden... Though the feeling is irrevocable... just try, okay?"

"But how?!" I cried. I felt terrible. Never in my wildest dream that I imagined that he felt the same. But it just made the matters worst. The feeling was mutual but it was still futile. I was hurt and so was he. "How can I ever do that… I know it's wrong and everything but stopping this… love, this feeling is too much for me to bear. I'd rather die-"

"Don't say that!" he snapped. "Don't' say that…" he lowly muttered and cursed to himself. He stepped back and I fell on my knees.

My breaths came short and felt my heart pounding so fast. I felt as if a part of me broke down and died. Those things he said were true, agonizingly true. The last thing I saw before I lost consciousness was his retreating figure.

…

Ten years had passed but still what happened before was still fresh on my memories.

I loved him and he loved me but we couldn't be together. Reality was too harsh and too true than a mere fairytale.

I fell and got hurt because out of all the people in the world, I chose to love my own cousin.

END 


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